Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Feelings I Do Not Choose




I feel:


Displaced

Uncertainty

Sadness

Emptiness

Loneliness 

A longing for life

Unfulfilled

Wasteful

What is my purpose?

Why am I here?

Today I am pushing through the rain. I guess we all have those days when sadness comes at uncertain times. Unexplained, a sense of emptiness, of longings unfulfilled.

I think of Ecclesiastes 3, as I glance longingly out my kitchen window. There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.

Is this a season of emptiness were I struggle with life and wonder how others continue? 


I have come full circle in a journey started eighteen years ago. As we face an uncertain future I wondering did I make the right choices for my children and myself?

My mind turns to the word
2 Corinthians 10:5 
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
How do I demolish the arguments from my heart? I test them again the word.

Eighteen years ago this month my wedding invitation said
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
And we have prospered. We have always had a home and hope. We will celebrate two of our miracles this month.


God has plans for me.
Proverbs 16:9 
In his heart a man plans his course,
 but the Lord determines his steps.
He determines my steps.
Proverbs 19:21 
Many are the plans in a man’s heart,
 but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.
His purpose prevails in my life.

It does not matter what I feel. It matters only what God’s Word said.

It matters that I choose to believe that He has planned my life and directs my choices for a prosperous future.

What choice is your heart struggling with today? What thoughts do you need to take captive?


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